Papa Roach

*Warren: I know we've differed on music before, but you have to give me this: The new P. Roach is off the meat rack! They have totally shattered the rap-metal mold. This is hands down this year's significant other. Lead singer Jacoby Shaddix (what a name!) and co. have evolved to include influences from party rap to conscience rap to party metal to rawking metal! A tour de force all the way through. (Dripping sarcasm could not be adequately conveyed in writing. Please add.)

*Adam: Funny you should mention their so-called "rap influences," because as far as I can tell, there is almost zero white-boy rap on the record at all! The only exception is the first single, "She Loves Me Not," and they probably only put a rap on there to make sure they sold some records. This is another case of a crap band thinking they're more important than they actually are.

*Warren: It's pretty easy for you to sit back and dismiss this great work as another pretender. The Roach isn't just for weightlifting at Sig-Eps anymore. They've gone on record on numerous social events showing a politically conscious side previously lacking. For example, Shaddix's stance on the issue of squares not being able to deal with the subject matter of suicide-smash "Last Resort": "Censorship is whack!" Right there, a clear example of the band taking a stand on an issue but not muddying it up with intellectual jargon. This is a band of the people.

*Adam: Ah yes ... Shaddix. The best political speaker this side of Fred Durst. I think the bottom line here is this: Papa Roach sold 3 million albums because suddenly their brand of sports metal is en vogue. While this might pay the bills for a few years, it in no way gives the band the OK to change their sound and get political. Think of their audience, for Christ's sake! Ages junior high to frat boy. We're not talking about the most discerning tastes here. Trying to pull a Moby and flipping their sound just won't be appreciated.

*Warren: Moby ... who? Nobody listens to techno! But seriously, you taking shots at the music taste of the average fraternity gentleman is completely unwarranted. It's not all pop punk and booty-rap anymore. The frat palette has expanded to include plenty of challenging artists like Incubus, Dave Matthews Band and John Mayer. The Roach seriously needs to be considered for inclusion on this prestigious list.

*Adam: I'm not even going to dignify that last statement with a comment.

*Warren: Suddenly the weight of the issues has you running and hiding! Face it, in your bid to come off as Johnny Intellectual McMusicfan, you are passing up meaningful stuff. I offer these Shaddix nuggets of wisdom: "Music is the best and worst thing that's happened to me," or how about, "Sept. 11 made me think about life in a different perspective ... this could be over at any time." Thank about it.

*Adam: Hopefully when he says 'this' could be over at any time, he's talking about his band's career. A band of this frivolity has no right even addressing Sept. 11. Allow me to strike back with my best evidence as to why this record blows: the lyrics from the liner notes. From the title track: "Hate and destruction crashed down on our world / the stars and stripes / the boys and girls / it's sad it took war just to bring us together / I believe in love". Even Incubus would call that pretentious wankery.

*Warren: I'll concede that this is a band still finding its feet lyrically, but at least they're trying for something. So the lyrics are a tiny bit contrived. So what?

*Adam: Sew buttons. It's their sixth album in seven years. Expecting them to find their feet lyrically at this point is like the time you sat by the phone on prom night waiting for your date to call. Oh, here's someone who did call you. It's Hot Topic. They said thanks for backing the Roach. Mall Rat.

*Warren: That's what I'm talking about! There's a lot of pain in the average teenager's life. The Roach lets this out in a creative way. It shouldn't be stifled.

*Adam: I'll give you that. One listen to this made me want to break up with my girlfriend. If I had one. And if I were 14.

*Warren: I guess we'll have to agree to disagree. I stand by my claim that this is a monumental record that everyone should pick up. (Dripping sarcasm. Do not buy this record.) It shows a band evolving under the guidance of a major label, which is something rare to see nowadays.

*Adam: I think I'll also stand by my earlier contention that you are a wiener.