Embracing our similarities

I remember learning all about U.S. history when I was a junior in high school. My teacher told us about the exciting place that our country was to so many immigrants. America -- the land of milk and honey. America -- the great melting pot. But are we really? Have we really melted together, or does each different race and gender showcasing their differences just make us a bunch of chunks thrown together in one big barrel?

I grew up on an American Indian reservation in Central Washington. Our town was 70 percent Hispanic. I was one of 10 white people in my entire high school. These percentages led to a certain amount of socio-economic disparity between the groups. In an effort to bring us all closer together every year, we had a big celebration called a Cultural Unity Fair so that we could learn to embrace the differences in our cultures. In theory this was the perfect opportunity for everyone to learn about everyone else's culture. Except that's not how it really turned out. Everyone spent his or her time at the fair learning about his or her own background with friends of the same background, re-learning things he or she already knew. The intent of the program was lost on the students, and as a result, it failed to teach them any new social understanding. And as is the case with many well-meaning, racially uplifting programs, it didn't accomplish what it started out to do. Instead of focusing on how we're all the same and how we should be able to get along, it heightened the awareness of our racial differences.

Why should we accentuate our differences? Why promote the "us-versus-them" mentality? When for decades we have been complaining about being judged based on gender or race or creed, why do we feel the need to form clubs and groups based on these same criteria? I recently received a scholarship from a women's organization, of which I was not a member. I was thinking about joining, but when I went to the awards banquet, my mind did a 180. The room was adorned in pink and purple tissue paper and the keynote speaker mentioned women's power and our struggle as women 17 times in her five-minute speech. I didn't fit in there. How can I expect to be treated as an equal by male coworkers when I go out of my way to emphasize how hard it is for us women?

When you are a member of a group, you are judged based on the actions of others in that group. As any member of the Greek system will tell you, Greeks are not all boozehounds, but you find one guy that is only here to drink and sleep around, and before you can say "beer bong," the stereotype is born. And just like Greek Row dwellers, I don't want to be judged by the actions of a few members of my group.

No one wants to be stereotyped. I don't want to be dubbed an incompetent driver just because I'm a woman, an uneducated hillbilly just because I grew up on a farm or a Bible thumper just because I happen to go to church. I also don't want to be dubbed a bigot just because I am white and use the word Indian to describe members of the tribe where I grew up. I am proud of my heritage, but it doesn't define me. I am my own person and I don't fit exactly into any of the categories that my race, ethnic background or family history would place me. I don't believe that anyone else does either, so I don't pigeonhole them accordingly.

Whatever the reason or story, we have all been thrown together to coexist as Americans. And that's what we are first and foremost -- Americans. Be proud of where you came from, celebrate diversity, but don't let it become a division between us. Rather than embracing our differences, we should embrace our similarities. Don't allow yourself to be defined by the color of your skin or the paycheck your parents bring home. You can be whoever you choose to be, but you are still one of us.